Wu-Tang Clan and Bill Murray Heist

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Wu-Tang Clan and Bill Murray Heist

Wu-Tang Clan and Bill Murray might be about to create history's finest piece of conceptual art...

You know how Wu-Tang turned their album Once Upon A Time In Shaolin into an art project — selling its one single copy to the highest bidder (“this is like somebody having the scepter of an Egyptian king” said RZA last spring, when it originally came to light). You probably know that pharmaceuticals cretin Martin Shkreli snapped it up for $2 million; and that, thanks to his snaky business practice (Shkreli hiked the price of Daraprim — a drug used to treat patients with AIDS, among other illnesses — from $13.50 to $750 per pill), RZA announced that a substantial sum of the sale would be making its way to charities. But the most fantabulous twist in this storyline was yet to come…

If what has been making its way around Twitter is true, the Clan inserted a clause into the contract that binds the buyer and sellers of Once Upon A Time In Shaolin. That they can steal it back. With, or without, Bill fucking Murray.

Once Upon A Time In Shaolin

“The buying party also agrees that, at any time during the stipulated 88 year period, the seller may legally plan and attempt to execute one (1) heist or caper to steal back Once Upon A Time In Shaolin, which, if successful, would return all ownership rights to the seller. Said heist or caper can only be undertaken by currently active members of the Wu-Tang Clan and/or actor Bill Murray, with no legal repercussions.”

If this is true. If this heist, or caper, happens. If Bill Murray pulls a pair of stockings over his head. This will be the greatest piece of conceptual art ever undertaken. Marina Abramovic will hang her head in shame, Drummond and Cauty will hurriedly reform The KLF and burn themselves on the remote Scottish isle of Jura. The Wu-Tang Clan and Bill Murray, stealing back their own art from America’s second most unpopular man. This. Is. Everything.

I just keep imagining Meth leaning over Shkreli, all: “I’ll fuckin’ sew your asshole closed, and keep feedin’ you and feedin’ you, and feedin’ you, and feedin’ you”.